Why Weren’t You There?


A Four-Year old M looks up at me one day and tells me she remembers getting her cast removed a year earlier and that her aunt took her to get it removed. “She was scared and needed her mommy that day,” she said. “Why weren’t you there?”

Many thoughts ran through my head as to what I should say. How could she remember that when she was 3? I was so focused on my husband dying, I hadn’t thought about what the kids were thinking or viewing the situation while I was taking care of him. I will never know what that period in our lives did to them. I said “I’m so sorry. You were scared and needed your mommy, and I wasn’t there. I was with your daddy who was very sick in the hospital. I’m so sorry.” She gave me a hug, and I wondered if it would come up again.

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